Grief podcast bringing up the subject of death
PUBLISHED: 12:00 14 November 2019
As part of the It's OK To Say mental health awareness team, founder Stacey Turner has been busting taboos surrounding grief and looking at the support we can offer each other.
Photograher, videographer and BBC journalist Kady Braine set up the Goodness Gracious Grief weekly podcast to break down some of the barriers surrounding death after losing her father.
"My reason for starting the podcast was not just because of my experience with grief - I lost my father on September 2 2015 - but because I was and am still uncomfortable with death and dying."
"The subject is taboo for many of us, but unless we have these conversations, how are we to know our loved ones' wishes.
"I guess I hoped by talking about it, I would break some barriers and ease the topic into my vocabulary so I can begin to think about what I would want so it doesn't have to be left as a burden on someone else whoever it may be that has to bury me one day."
Kady said she found it helped her personally to create the podcasts and hopes she is reaching out to others offering reassurance.
Stacey offered her own input into the issue of grief: "I feel like life has offered me something really special, the chance to give people the freedom to acknowledge and talk - if they want to - about their experiences and how it has shaped them as a person, how they felt and navigated their way through.
"By sharing our experiences, we create reassurance, provide hope - even just a sprinkling - and try help another person feel less alone."
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Following their meeting, both Stacey and Kady decided they wanted to work together.
Kady explained: "There was something no words can describe, a connection. Kady at that point didn't know that I too had lost my father and while our circumstances were different, we have both felt hurt so consuming with the various and ever-changing phases of grief.
"We have both had to face the legal side of things, which amongst it all you don't really want to face. It is a long and painful process and even after some time has passed, it's weird how a piece of paper can bring all those feelings back like a punch in the chest."
Goodness Gracious Grief was born out of facing a fear of death and dying coupled with Kady's personal experience of losing her father, a father that she didn't know very well.
Kady said: "I thought, how do I bury him when I didn't know him,? What songs should I play at his funeral? It's so important people have these conversations so they don't have to go through what I went through. While my dad and I didn't have the closest of relationships, one thing I know for sure is that he was extremely proud of me and everything I achieved."
Kady's podcasts have ranged from conversations with various people about their experiences to interviewing representatives of organisations campaigning to make a difference when it comes to death.
This week's show is on the theme of 'choosing to die', and features a conversation with Sara Fenton whose husband took himself to the Dignitas clinic, where he drank a life-ending medication prescribed by doctors. Kady also talks to Ellie Ball from Dignity is Dying who is campaigning to change the laws on assisted dying in the UK.
Goodness Gracious Grief can be found at https://anchor.fm/goodness-gracious-grief or is available in your usual places: iTunes and Spotify.
Stacey added: "Kady is really exploring everything surrounding death and grief hoping to inform people that there are so many choices, you're not alone and there is help available out there. I would like to say a heartfelt thank you to her for sharing her story to wrap a hug around and inspire others, not to mention trusting me."
If you would like to share your story or sponsor a particular page on It's OK To Say's new website, please email firstname.lastname@example.org